Mott’s Applesauce

1. Laughing so hard that coke/milk/ice cream (yes, it can happen) comes out of your nose. You feel quite attractive and the tickling sensation in your nostrils reminds you that you shouldn’t be out in public except on national holidays.

2. Ring pops, candy necklaces, tootsie rolls and applesauce. Nothing like good ole sugary jewelry and Mott’s to do the trick. That and you’re on a sugar rush for about 30 minutes.

3. When mom says she made your favorite tabkha, or home-cooked meal, and your other siblings complain that you’re the favorite. Part of you believes it too. Maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh.

4. The smell of crayons.

5. When white glue dries on your hands and you peel it off like your a molting snake. Okay, maybe that one’s just me.

6. McDonald’s Happy Meals. And the toys. Why can’t they make one with a Big Mac?

7. Presents. Basically anything wrapped in paper or in a giftbag. As long as it’s not undies from your grandma or a giftcard. Come on people, if you’re going to do that, just fork over cash. At least then I’m not forced to spend your money in the not-for-sale section of ABC, therefore causing me to pay the difference for my present.

8. People singing “Happy Birthday” to you…in 3 languages because we’re arrogant trilinguals. I actually don’t enjoy this prolonged moment of attention while you watch candle wax get all over the frosting on your cake and all you’re thinking is “wow, they spelled my name wrong again.”

9. CANNONBALL!

10. Stepping on crispy fallen leaves. The loud crunch under your feet makes you feel like you just squashed a village with your powerful godly step. “Beware village to the north, I shall crush thee.”